thoughts of a first time half marathoner

Yes. I joined the bandwagon, I ran a half marathon when I am just reaching thirties. I also must be one of those n people who are penning down things that flashed through their mind as they drudged kilometer after kilometer.

So to set the records straight, I have wanted to take up one sport and follow it continuously, passionately (at least with interest) and get rid of negativity in life and around it (at least shift my focus away from it) and hence in the pursuit become a better person. Cliched as it may sound this motivation has payed off well. The past year has been about running, training, developing endurance and fitness. I am still an amateur and may remain one but I am enjoying the feeling of well being that comes along with any rewarding physical activity. 

It all started earlier this year when a friend asked me to join her for a Sunday run. We did badly, ran walked, but we stuck to the plan of meeting up every Sunday for a run and breakfast afterwards. The breakfast bit is most important as that remained our motivation for initial 3-4 months. We would barely finish the 5k and then eat. A routine I started enjoying immensely. I also joined the gym in the wake of getting other body parts to become stronger. Some wrong running on treadmill and an injury later, my tryst with the gym ended. I have never been a gym person, so I was glad to put all this behind me. A good 2 month break later I was back to running. By this time I had made lot of acquaintances who ran on Sundays at the place I went running to. Questions started popping. They would see me do a good 5k and would ask why not run more ? Of course, I would reply running was not my thing. I do it cos its fun and the breakfast courses taste delicious afterwards. All in good jest. Deep down I was shit scared of doing longer distances, of pushing myself. What if I got injured, what if I could not do it, what if I failed.

A close friend who lives in the US and had registered for her first half marathon, started sharing her training stories. Partly inspired by her and partly to test myself, I too enrolled in a training program (a dedicated post about that later). I started beating my own distances without pushing myself too far or stretching my endurance. I started clocking distances as long as 8km without breaks. The fear of the big 21.1 was still hovering over me, but at least I had developed stamina to imagine myself doing it. I ran a 10km in 70 minutes 2 weeks before the marathon day. And then just started gathering my will power and concentrating my energies for the half marathon. I had never felt so focused and nervous after the 12th standard board exams I gave.

These were the thoughts streaming through my mind as the race progressed.

• at 7.22 am in my watch: race start time was 7.20 am, they have not started the race yet. I have to pee.
• 7.25 am: the race has started. nice and steady. wow a boy with polio running with his father. wow. I have to pee.
• 8 am: how much have I run so far. is it 5km yet (I run with a pace of 7-7.5 km). Whee so many runners together. how exciting for the cops to manage traffic for us.
• 8.15 am: hi-5ved few onlooker kids. They are cheering for us. Yayyy.
• 8.20 am: Why cant I see any water station. I need water. I am walking now in hope of seeing a water station. Uncle stops by asks me to push it and tells me there is a water station along the corner.
• 8.35 am: all tricks. no water station yet. I am still pushing it. A nice fellow offers me his energy drink. Remind myself - you cant drink all that. Give it back after a sip. Curse myself for throwing off that water bottle in the bin.
• 8.45 am: water station. Yay. But they dont have bottles only disposable glasses. Its going to be ok.
• 9 am: spotted an aunty carrying water on her bike for runners. thank god for good people.
• 9.15 am: I am entering area of the city where I live, come on give them a run for their claps, run dont stop is what I am telling myself. I stop at a water booth, pick a small bottle, splash some on my face to get rid of the sweat and start running. People are cheering us by our names (bibs had our names printed). For the first time in life I am not conscious of strangers screaming my name.
• 9.20 am: I am in part of the route where it starts elevating gradually. Strategy change, I am walking fast now. 500 meters of this slope done. Running again. This has given me enough strength to run 1.5 km without break. 
• 9.30 am: only 4km remaining. I am in the busiest part of the city. All the traffic has been stopped and people are cheering like crazy now.
• 9.45 am: 2 km remaining. I see the 19km sign board. My feet have started to give up. Its like I have stones tied around my ankles. I cannot run anymore. I am walking. An uncle comes along and asks me to join him, to run together. I tell him I cannot feel my legs. He says dont worry about it.
• 9.55 am: I am 500 meters from finish point. Gathering whatever will power is left inside me, I make a run for it. See bunch of my coaches along, they cheer and tell me you are done, carry on.
• 9.57 am: meet a runner friend/photographer at the 50 meters from finish line mark. I am grinning as he clicks snaps. I am done and dusted in the next 2 minutes. As I hit the lawn to cool down and relax, I notice someone took away my water bottle. I am not angry or frustrated with those people. I am happy, enjoying the moment, not caring about anything. (no thought of 'I have to pee' after 5 minutes into the run, if you observed)

Because of running I have met the most amazing and inspiring people over the last few months from all age groups. I have made some really good 'runner' friends and gurus, with whom I can discuss any silly running insight. 
I am sure I have conquered the fear of running longer distances. Of course the big 42 still looms in the distance. May be in 3-4 years I will conquer that too. In a way I was looking forward for these 2.5 months to get over, because I was bored of living the routine life, eating the same proteins, sleeping early etc etc. But as the half marathon day approached, I had new questions about what now ? what next ? 

I think I have the answers now and a tentative strategy even if no sure way to implement it. 

~ A girl who became a runner and started a small change in her life.